I will never forget the moment when I was 28 and my dad told me, “I’ve been coaching high school sports for over 25 years and you were one of the hardest players to coach that I ever had.” That stung; really badly.
I had always wondered why during basketball practice my dad would freely offer up coaching to the other players, but rarely offered anything to me. I asked him about that during our conversation and he said that I would not receive his coaching. I always “knew more than he did” and would basically blow him off. So he chose to quit offering coaching to me and only give me advice when I asked for it, which was rare.
I could go much deeper into the psychological effect this conversation had on me, but I will spare you. I bring this watershed moment in my life to your attention to say that we all need coaches, but we have to WANT to be coached.
I didn’t want to be coached as a 16 year old and I still don’t really want to be coached as a 49 year old. Why?
- Coaches point out things about us that are not functioning on all cylinders
- Coaches challenge us to get out of our comfort zones
- Coaches push us beyond where we comfortably want to go on our own
- Coaches say things to us in tones that we may not really like
If we are willing to admit it, we are all narcissistic in nature. We have a very high opinion of ourselves. No one “enjoys” having their weaknesses pointed out to them. No one “enjoys” changing the way they do things; especially if they have been somewhat successful in the past.
However, we all need to be coached. Like we saw in the video above, even someone like Eric Schmidt, who was virtually at the top of “the ladder” while serving as Google’s CEO, found benefits in having a coach. The same is true for famous athletes, Hollywood stars, and all of us down on the lower rungs. No matter who we are or what we do, we can all can get better, whether it be in relationships, techniques, leading, praying, or other areas in our lives.
At Generis we think every church should have a Generosity Coach. Check out our resources that might help your church accelerate generosity.